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KayCee
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 3478
Location: Laura Trade Centre 13th Floor
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 12:15 am Post subject: spillin my beans |
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:cry: I have to leave soon to go to the wake of my friends mother its a very sad day. Also, after I have to go to the Hospital for my best friend. His mother (which I love very much) Has battled long illness & just as she was getting better she had a massive stroke. :( Only one third of her brain is working & I know as well as he does she did not want to live like that. They removed her feeding tube & Iv yesterday morning. They are only giving her drugs to make her comfortable. I have to go to say goodbye for this lovely woman & I dont want to!!
Keep me in your thoughts my friends. This is a very hard thing for me to do. :cry: :cry: |
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Hedgehog
Joined: 10 Mar 2005
Posts: 5171
Location: UK
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 12:28 am Post subject: |
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| Take care kayCee an angel to be with you........ |
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KayCee
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 3478
Location: Laura Trade Centre 13th Floor
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 12:33 am Post subject: |
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| Thanks Hedgy means a lot |
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KayCee
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 3478
Location: Laura Trade Centre 13th Floor
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 6:31 am Post subject: |
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Everyone is asleep, no one for me to talk to so I will write here.
It was very strange for me tonight to go & sit with Doris & know it was the last time I would see her alive. The last time I would hold her hand or talk to her.
Its very sad to see my best friend loosing his mom. I know its the circle of life. That makes it no better.
I was able to thank her for sharing her life with me, her stories, her love. For all her laughs & all our tears. For each moment with her. I was able to tellher not to be afraid, that its ok to go. That I know she will watch over us.
I was able to make my friend laugh & rememberstuff from when we were kids. I was able to hold him as he cried. Hold hios wife as well & His sister. I was able to keep myself from crying too. Until now this moment as I write this.
I want to trun around & go back to the hospital & hold her hand, I want to scream at the top of my lungs how unfair for her to suffer! I want to run to my friends house & tell him again how very sorry I am.
I feel lost, hurt, scared, sad, Happy, angry, confused. ect ect...
I dont know what Im saying anymore... |
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Hedgehog
Joined: 10 Mar 2005
Posts: 5171
Location: UK
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 10:47 am Post subject: |
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Oh you poor pussycat. Take comfort that you were there, I am sure she did
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Winky
Joined: 20 Dec 2004
Posts: 4586
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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KayCee wrote: Everyone is asleep, no one for me to talk to so I will write here.
It was very strange for me tonight to go & sit with Doris & know it was the last time I would see her alive. The last time I would hold her hand or talk to her.
Its very sad to see my best friend loosing his mom. I know its the circle of life. That makes it no better.
I was able to thank her for sharing her life with me, her stories, her love. For all her laughs & all our tears. For each moment with her. I was able to tellher not to be afraid, that its ok to go. That I know she will watch over us.
I was able to make my friend laugh & rememberstuff from when we were kids. I was able to hold him as he cried. Hold hios wife as well & His sister. I was able to keep myself from crying too. Until now this moment as I write this.
I want to trun around & go back to the hospital & hold her hand, I want to scream at the top of my lungs how unfair for her to suffer! I want to run to my friends house & tell him again how very sorry I am.
I feel lost, hurt, scared, sad, Happy, angry, confused. ect ect...
I dont know what Im saying anymore...
Kay ..
I am sitting here crying , all sorts of memories flooding back .
These are moments in your life you will never forget Kay
However painful , they make you grow and are very special I send you lots of love my friend |
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kamar
Joined: 24 Apr 2004
Posts: 10597
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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| Kay.............. |
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KayCee
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 3478
Location: Laura Trade Centre 13th Floor
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| Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2005 2:47 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks Kamar & Hedgy & Winks ...
I woke up this AM with a feeling of wanting ot go back there. But Im not sure its a good Idea. Im confused. Its very strange for me.
I deal with death & dying on a daily basis at work. But its not personal like that.
I know she will be better off when she passes, I made sure to tell her its ok to go. But, but, but....
ANyhow thanks all, its a hard time for me. Im happy at least I have a place I know you all care & can try to understand my fractured writing, thoughts & feelings. Thanks. |
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Sara_18
Joined: 27 Nov 2004
Posts: 554
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| Posted: Sun Sep 11, 2005 12:55 am Post subject: |
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KayCee,
My heart goes out to you. I know that this is a very difficult and painful time for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I understand what you are going through and how hard it is. I know it is harder to deal with it when it is personal. You can deal with death everyday and it still doesn't help when it is someone close to you.
I ask God to bless you and your friend's family during this most difficult time. You are a good friend. |
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