Your Egypt

Wedi · Joined: 07 Jun 2004 Posts: 144 Location: South Carolina

How are the household chores typically divided between the genders in Egypt, or how common is the hiring of servants?

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

wedi...there's no typical division it really depends on the man..
If the man has lived a European style of life, maybe he will help but in general there's a housekeeper for the heavy duties...the wife cooks ...but
some Egyptian men even cook..some of the best cooks are men remember...but it is all related to their background and their mentality.
some think it is not macho to help the wife, others think in a different way.

Maybe some men here could add information???

Wedi wrote: How are the household chores typically divided between the genders in Egypt, or how common is the hiring of servants?

Eastern girl · Joined: 21 May 2004 Posts: 760 Location: Cairo, Egypt

As monica said it depends on the boy himself, my dear boy can cook better than me! :shock: and the reason is his mom had to work out, so he and his brothers had to help eachother and he really loves cooking, i guess he doesn't trust my cooking in other way!!!! :smt043

raymon · Joined: 20 Nov 2003 Posts: 1452 Location: Here

Well I see the ideal thing is to divide it fairly enough. For example, if I were married:
She cooks, I eat.
I mess up, she cleans up.
I use dishes, she washes them.
She makes tea, I drink it … etc.
- to feminists: I was kidding -

Seriously, I am ready to share everything … but no way on earth I’d wash dishes. You have to kill me first :smt021

And I shall claim that generally men don’t do housework in Egypt, and the responsibility is mainly women’s. This thing seems to be evident as you go down in the society … among poor classes and peasants that are the majority in Egypt.

Wedi · Joined: 07 Jun 2004 Posts: 144 Location: South Carolina

You are funny. I see your tactic now..........you will have her laughing while she is doing the all the work, so she won't mind! Lol

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

Mmmmm but for how long this tactic is going to last ...ray...hein? :twisted:

Seriously I believe that some men are really helpful...I know actually..

take my dad for example and he ain't spring chicken anymore...he gets up and takes the plates to the kitchen...then once they are washed ( dishwasher) he empties the dishwasher leaving the dishes on the kitchen counter for mama to organize...and he also sets the table...and he also makes coffee after dinner...Turkish coffee that is .............Not bad right???

My best friend cooks as well as my brother....

So there's hope that more Egyptian men are willing to cooperate!!!

:wink:

Wedi wrote: You are funny. I see your tactic now..........you will have her laughing while she is doing the all the work, so she won't mind! Lol

ScienceSailor · Joined: 29 May 2004 Posts: 667 Location: Alexandria

Monica wrote:
take my dad for example and he ain't spring chicken anymore...he gets up and takes the plates to the kitchen...then once they are washed ( dishwasher) he empties the dishwasher leaving the dishes on the kitchen counter for mama to organize...and he also sets the table...and he also makes coffee after dinner...Turkish coffee that is .............Not bad right???

Ms Monica
Saw this post by a coincidence while have just finished from washing a lot of dishes, my dear wife left to see her sisters before we leave to our summer residence. I decided to help and let her have a relief when she gets back. She has been working all the day in preparing our luggage and making sure every detail is kept in order. What I did is just a silent thank you/little reward for all she does to let me have a comfortable life style.
Although she might say: I could have used the washing machine, see thhese fats on the sink walls. But I do what I believe should be done. I hate these washing machines, whether in America or Egypt, they do not clean the glass as I do when I use soap, yes a bar (Sunlight) that my wife can not stand seeing me using it without her delicate kitchen gloves.

Other than this I am prohibited not to touch any other thing in "her" kitchen, otherwise she makes me feel as if A Terror has been done!
Have a goodevening.
Salam

Sphinsxo · Joined: 11 Jun 2004 Posts: 1524 Location: The World

Yes why not?

It is called the house work.. not the woman work...

I must admit... I would rather not.. but then again women don't enjoy it either... so it has to be done.

stellaspice · Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 452 Location: Bristol, England

Regrettably, it does seem that a large majority of Egyptian men seem to believe that the housework is for the women - at least in my limited experience anyway. My husband is better than most; we both work full-time and so I come home and cook the dinner and he washes up the dishes; but I sometimes get comments like 'if we were in Egypt I would not be doing this' or he likes to remind me how enlightened he is, for an Eygptian man.

But to be honest; I generally end up doing the lions share of the housework - the best time to get him involved is when we have friends visiting and there is a limited amount of time left to vacuum / do the dishes etc before they arrive - then he OFFERS to help -

Anyway - have to go now - I should be working and not on the internet !!!!

:P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

Hey there stellaspice..
Your comments are appreciated always..
see you after work then!!
:):):)

stellaspice wrote: Regrettably, it does seem that a large majority of Egyptian men seem to believe that the housework is for the women - at least in my limited experience anyway. My husband is better than most; we both work full-time and so I come home and cook the dinner and he washes up the dishes; but I sometimes get comments like 'if we were in Egypt I would not be doing this' or he likes to remind me how enlightened he is, for an Eygptian man.

But to be honest; I generally end up doing the lions share of the housework - the best time to get him involved is when we have friends visiting and there is a limited amount of time left to vacuum / do the dishes etc before they arrive - then he OFFERS to help -

Anyway - have to go now - I should be working and not on the internet !!!!

:P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P

stellaspice · Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 452 Location: Bristol, England

I wish - but no internet at home - at least not yet. Still, manage to get on sneakily every now and again - and of course during my lunchbreak. I love the site - wish I had found it earlier - still better late than never.

p.s. I might moan about my husband - but I do love him to bits !!!!!

Marky · Joined: 05 Jun 2004 Posts: 327 Location: Cairo!

Hi,

My wife finds it strange to "let" me do anything round the house, but she's happy when I do them bardu.... it's a cultural thing I guess :? On the other hand, since it's not "expected" of me, it's more appreciated when it's done, and I like that ;)

Sara18 · Joined: 07 Jul 2004 Posts: 179

Hi Everyone

I have been reading the post here for about a month now. I really like this website and the people that participate here. I appreciate all the good information that is shared in a genuine and positive way. I have been married to a Middle Eastern Muslim man for twenty years now. I originally found this board and ES when I was doing some research on Egypt. It is our hope and the dream of our very ill daughter to come to Egypt in the next couple of years. While I have found the information invaluable, what I didn't expect to gain was a wonderful new insight into how my muslim man thought. I am Chrisitian. I now understand why he says many of things to me that he does and how he thinks. I thank you for this. I also can now tell our children the many ways that their father shows his deep love for us in ways that the kids don't always see. I can tell him that many of the things that he does and says are quite normal for the Middle Eastern man.
Thank you so much for this.

Now to the question posed. My husband is a wonderful cook. He won't cook though because he says that what he has me for. He is very proud to tell people at work that every night he comes home to a warm cooked meal, even when I was working full time. When he criticizes the meal, you know too much salt, not enough salt, meat is tough, I will get upset and tell him that it can't be that bad or he would get up and cook it himself. He just winks at me. He does housework. He will pick up HIS dishes and put them in the sink. Don't understand why that doesn't translate to picking up everyone else's dishes. He will vacuum, clean the bathrooms, change diapers, but he will not make a bed.........EVER. That one I have not been able to figure out.

He was very close to his late mother and she was the one that taught him to cook and clean. One of his brothers is here and he won't do anything but set on the couch and say, "honey, get daddy a glass of water."

My husband tried that once and I asked him if his legs were broken. We still laugh at that one. Even though he will not make a bed, I wouldn't trade my Muslim husband and his wonderful, warm and loving family for anything.

Salam- You all are wonderful!

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

Hi sara18...such a nice and genuine testimony...
:) You know you have a good man there. In arabic: rabena yikhalee ( God bless)

When a man cooks well, I would see it more as constructive criticism then just plain complaining.

And then we can become the best cooks in the world...!!!!

Good to see you posting...until the next...

Salam!!
Sara18 wrote: Hi Everyone

I have been reading the post here for about a month now. I really like this website and the people that participate here. I appreciate all the good information that is shared in a genuine and positive way. I have been married to a Middle Eastern Muslim man for twenty years now. I originally found this board and ES when I was doing some research on Egypt. It is our hope and the dream of our very ill daughter to come to Egypt in the next couple of years. While I have found the information invaluable, what I didn't expect to gain was a wonderful new insight into how my muslim man thought. I am Chrisitian. I now understand why he says many of things to me that he does and how he thinks. I thank you for this. I also can now tell our children the many ways that their father shows his deep love for us in ways that the kids don't always see. I can tell him that many of the things that he does and says are quite normal for the Middle Eastern man.
Thank you so much for this.

Now to the question posed. My husband is a wonderful cook. He won't cook though because he says that what he has me for. He is very proud to tell people at work that every night he comes home to a warm cooked meal, even when I was working full time. When he criticizes the meal, you know too much salt, not enough salt, meat is tough, I will get upset and tell him that it can't be that bad or he would get up and cook it himself. He just winks at me. He does housework. He will pick up HIS dishes and put them in the sink. Don't understand why that doesn't translate to picking up everyone else's dishes. He will vacuum, clean the bathrooms, change diapers, but he will not make a bed.........EVER. That one I have not been able to figure out.

He was very close to his late mother and she was the one that taught him to cook and clean. One of his brothers is here and he won't do anything but set on the couch and say, "honey, get daddy a glass of water."

My husband tried that once and I asked him if his legs were broken. We still laugh at that one. Even though he will not make a bed, I wouldn't trade my Muslim husband and his wonderful, warm and loving family for anything.

Salam- You all are wonderful!

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

wallahy ya Marky you seem to be enjoying all this Egyptian cultural stuff - bardu - :P ..it makes me smile...and I bet your wife does appreciate it big time!!
Keep us posted..It is usually Foreign woman vs Egyptian man..so this is interesting :lol: ...

Marky wrote: Hi,

My wife finds it strange to "let" me do anything round the house, but she's happy when I do them bardu.... it's a cultural thing I guess :? On the other hand, since it's not "expected" of me, it's more appreciated when it's done, and I like that ;)