Your Egypt

ZouZa · Joined: 29 Aug 2004 Posts: 7

According to philosophers, happiness is determined by how much of our lives is spent in the state of want to

Our life has its share of shoulds and Egyptians will agree that we are the 'shoulds' culture.

We have to visit people because we feel we should. Presents we buy because we feel we should. We call the uncle and the aunt because we feel we should. We get married, sometimes, because we feel we should.

But do we want to get married?

I decided to put marriage in the freezer for the time being..and surely I am being criticized. Offers abound, but I will not budge. I say NO to marriage for the time being.

Don't get me wrong, I love men. Especially Egyptians. Coming from a family of 3 brothers, I was spoiled rotten.

But, I ask you what is it good for, marriage?

Once the babies come we are stuck. Cooking and cleaning or supervising the cleaners and cooking again, and probably clean after the cleaners.

Let's face it as a divorced mother I do not want this experience again. At least for now.

If you had a choice would you WANT to get married?

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

But ya ZouZa..you look ready for marriage in the picture!!! What are men supposed to do!!?
:wink:

I say marriage is complicated...unless you are marrying your best friend..
I like this idea!

But if your best friend turns out to be our 'ennemy' after marriage, then I would have a shock..

What people say? not concerned about that.

So yes to marriage, on only one condition that the husband is the real best friend. The one I would go to when my husband is annoying me ... :wink: meaning I can say what's on my mind without fear, with comfort and trust. A special relationship. Partners in crime as well as in joy. Complicity...compatability...best friends..no secrets..no doubts..openness..my Number 1 friend or nothing.

If not, I say NO to marriage and NO to relationships.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Jaguar · Joined: 21 Mar 2004 Posts: 2039

ZouZa... a very pragmatic argument.... you have a good point. I always thought I'd give it a third try, but it seems I am unfit to be coped with... nothing to do with my good or bad nature.

Gamalat · Joined: 09 Aug 2004 Posts: 915

I would want to have a partner...and as the society defines that the only form of male partner that a "respectable" woman can have, is the so-called husband, then I would marry !!!..

ZouZa wrote: According to philosophers, happiness is determined by how much of our lives is spent in the state of want to

Our life has its share of shoulds and Egyptians will agree that we are the 'shoulds' culture.

We have to visit people because we feel we should. Presents we buy because we feel we should. We call the uncle and the aunt because we feel we should. We get married, sometimes, because we feel we should.

But do we want to get married?

I decided to put marriage in the freezer for the time being..and surely I am being criticized. Offers abound, but I will not budge. I say NO to marriage for the time being.

Don't get me wrong, I love men. Especially Egyptians. Coming from a family of 3 brothers, I was spoiled rotten.

But, I ask you what is it good for, marriage?

Once the babies come we are stuck. Cooking and cleaning or supervising the cleaners and cooking again, and probably clean after the cleaners.

Let's face it as a divorced mother I do not want this experience again. At least for now.

If you had a choice would you WANT to get married?

Eastern girl · Joined: 21 May 2004 Posts: 760 Location: Cairo, Egypt

Jaguar wrote: ZouZa... a very pragmatic argument.... you have a good poing. I always thought I'd give it a third try, but it seems I am unfit to be coped with... nothing to do with my good or bad nature.

Very encouraging indeed!!!!! I shall tell u in a month after my ceremony!!!! :lol:

Jaguar · Joined: 21 Mar 2004 Posts: 2039

Ya 3aroosa.. I wish you the best of luck.

dreamcatcher · Joined: 01 May 2004 Posts: 1070

Yeah I agree with all sentiments.
Marriage is like a besieged city
The people who are in it, want to get out
The people out of it, want to get in.

Marriage is hardword it requires all the c"s
Communication
communication
communication
compassion
sometimes one has to concede, when the complaints dept does not stop with the hannering
called compromise to avoid conflict
convert the negative to FEEL THE LOVE..........heheeee

On reflection, no, I will never get married again if I do ever get divorsed.
Would not have the energy to be on the dating scene or the inclination,
can you imagine having to go out there and start all over again to get to know someone, then in the end, do you truely know them, no not for me thankx. It is all an illusion.

Gamalat · Joined: 09 Aug 2004 Posts: 915

U mean u wont get involved again or u wont get married again ?

dreamcatcher wrote:
On reflection, no, I will never get married again if I do ever get divorsed.
Would not have the energy to be on the dating scene or the inclination,
can you imagine having to go out there and start all over again to get to know someone, then in the end, do you truely know them, no not for me thankx. It is all an illusion.

BaNaNa`SpLiT · Joined: 21 Jul 2004 Posts: 1702 Location: All over

ZouZa wrote: According to philosophers, happiness is determined by how much of our lives is spent in the state of want to

Our life has its share of shoulds and Egyptians will agree that we are the 'shoulds' culture.

We have to visit people because we feel we should. Presents we buy because we feel we should. We call the uncle and the aunt because we feel we should. We get married, sometimes, because we feel we should.

But do we want to get married?

I decided to put marriage in the freezer for the time being..and surely I am being criticized. Offers abound, but I will not budge. I say NO to marriage for the time being.

Don't get me wrong, I love men. Especially Egyptians. Coming from a family of 3 brothers, I was spoiled rotten.

But, I ask you what is it good for, marriage?

Once the babies come we are stuck. Cooking and cleaning or supervising the cleaners and cooking again, and probably clean after the cleaners.

Let's face it as a divorced mother I do not want this experience again. At least for now.

If you had a choice would you WANT to get married?

mesh fahem why wouldn't we want to get married? Hwa el nas la2yeen marriage aslan? :lol: Seriously I don't understand who forced whom to get married in these days?
What is marriage good for? It's the only right way to make a family and have kids and grow old with someone you care about and all that.
What do you mean once babies come you're stuck? Stuck leeh?! My idea of marriage is for sure different than cleaning and cooking or supervising who does this :?
The fact that it didn't work once doesn't mean that it won't work ever. accidents happen and people get up and move on.
tetgawezeeny ya tant w aghsellek el toba2? :lol: no offense. just kidding

Gamalat · Joined: 09 Aug 2004 Posts: 915

A typical opinion of a single never-married male :lol: :lol:

BaNaNa`SpLiT wrote: ZouZa wrote: According to philosophers, happiness is determined by how much of our lives is spent in the state of want to

Our life has its share of shoulds and Egyptians will agree that we are the 'shoulds' culture.

We have to visit people because we feel we should. Presents we buy because we feel we should. We call the uncle and the aunt because we feel we should. We get married, sometimes, because we feel we should.

But do we want to get married?

I decided to put marriage in the freezer for the time being..and surely I am being criticized. Offers abound, but I will not budge. I say NO to marriage for the time being.

Don't get me wrong, I love men. Especially Egyptians. Coming from a family of 3 brothers, I was spoiled rotten.

But, I ask you what is it good for, marriage?

Once the babies come we are stuck. Cooking and cleaning or supervising the cleaners and cooking again, and probably clean after the cleaners.

Let's face it as a divorced mother I do not want this experience again. At least for now.

If you had a choice would you WANT to get married?

mesh fahem why wouldn't we want to get married? Hwa el nas la2yeen marriage aslan? :lol: Seriously I don't understand who forced whom to get married in these days?
What is marriage good for? It's the only right way to make a family and have kids and grow old with someone you care about and all that.
What do you mean once babies come you're stuck? Stuck leeh?! My idea of marriage is for sure different than cleaning and cooking or supervising who does this :?
The fact that it didn't work once doesn't mean that it won't work ever. accidents happen and people get up and move on.
tetgawezeeny ya tant w aghsellek el toba2? :lol: no offense. just kidding

BaNaNa`SpLiT · Joined: 21 Jul 2004 Posts: 1702 Location: All over

Gamalat wrote: A typical opinion of a single never-married male :lol: :lol:

Says who? :wink:

dreamcatcher · Joined: 01 May 2004 Posts: 1070

:D :D

Monica · Joined: 10 Mar 2004 Posts: 4933 Location: Egypt

Tomorrow, God willing..things will change to the better!

Have faith!

:wink:

Jaguar wrote: ZouZa... a very pragmatic argument.... you have a good point. I always thought I'd give it a third try, but it seems I am unfit to be coped with... nothing to do with my good or bad nature.

ZouZa · Joined: 29 Aug 2004 Posts: 7

Monica and new friends,

Thank you for the replies. Many creative and sincere minds around this group. I appreciate all your comments.

Oscar Wilde said: 'Only the shallow know themselves'. I think he is right.

There can be no end to the process of self-discovery if we are continually learning, growing and changing. Only us can assume the challenge of our voyage. And there is no greater loss for all of us than a life unlived.

Any serious human relationship takes work. Two individuals working together. Compromising is the secret word.

Today, not a lot of people are ready to do so.

I am not ready to die alive. I have a life to live, a generous heart and an alert brain. I am not ready to wait for the other to wake up one day after several years, and realize what he is about to lose, and finally lend me a helping hand to work together as one.

The right package has not been delivered. In the meantime, frankly, I have a life to live to the fullest!

If the right package comes to your door and if it is the full combo, all dressed for you, do not hesitate.

Unfortunately these packages tend to get lost in traffic on the way home.

In Egypt, a lot of 'arranged' marriages are still very popular. Strangely enough many do work. As Gamalate said, a relationship beneficial to both. That is just the way it is. Egypt has also a very high divorce rate, and more career women prefer NOT to re-marry.

Could it be that the marriage 'system' is in need of improvement?

BaNaNa`SpLiT · Joined: 21 Jul 2004 Posts: 1702 Location: All over

da engeleezi da ya morsi? (I'm lost) :shock:

Why is it strange that some arranged marriages work? Actually I see that arranged marriages work more than the love-story marrigaes and no not an official statistic.
What do you mean changing the marriage system? Choose whatever system that suits you and apply it the way you like it. besara7a I don't understand what you're trying to say in your post so maybe you will explain a little? Thanks